Wednesday, February 29, 2012


Basics to gaining Self-Esteem

1. You have to make the choice to make the change: As long as you, yourself don’t make the decision to make a change in your life, nobody can help you. It may be hard, since many times when we’re going through tough situations, we focus more on what is going wrong in our lives than what is going right. I have found through personal experience that starting a gratitude journal can help in a big way. A gratitude journal is a personal journal where you write at least five things that you are grateful for on, that particular day. It can be something as simple as having hot water to shower with or having a job. Whatever you feel you are grateful for in that moment, write it down and it will serve you as a reminder of how blessed you really are. This journal will put things in perspective and make you see things you weren’t aware of before and it will also make you appreciate those around you more. This is an easy and effective first step and if you Choose to take it, you are on your way :)
 2. Learn to accept yourself: Let’s face it, nobody is perfect. We are human beings and we are not meant to be perfect. We all make mistakes and what we must do is just learn from them and move on. We must first learn the lesson in order to leave it behind. We must all learn to forgive ourselves in the process too because even if we don’t want it to, life goes on and so do the people around us. If we keep holding on to our misfortunes we are held back and when we allow that we sometimes get stuck in a vicious cycle. Treat yourself the way you would want to be treated, with understanding, kindness and love.

 3. Surround yourself with positive people: The secret of being charismatic is how we make other people feel, isn’t it? We feel most alive in the moments when we are with someone who lifts our spirits up. That is why you need to hang out with those people who make you feel better about yourself. We have all come across those negative people who will suck the life right out of you! Like they say, “misery loves company,” but you don’t want to be that kind of company, that will only bring you down. Pick your friends wisely because they do in many ways help or harm the person you are. Choose to spend time with those who are willing to encourage you along your journey and vice versa, be a great friend to them and go out of your way to make them feel special :) Always remember that you either increase or decrease your sense of well being through the people and activities you bring into your life.
4. Exercise your body: people underestimate the importance of exercise as it relates to having a great self-esteem. When we exercise our bodies we release endorphins and these “happy hormones” give us that push we need in order to deal with the curve balls life throws at us. It is not called the happy hormone for nothing and it has been scientifically proven. After exercise we usually get a needed boost of energy and an improvement in mood, who can complain about that?! For those of you who enjoy group exercise I really recommend trying a Zumba class. Zumba is a cardio dance mix and it is very fun! You pretty much feel like you are at a Latin club minus the alcohol, plus you end up with some hot new dance moves. I would also recommend trying out yoga. Yoga is the opposite of Zumba, it is very quiet and extremely relaxing. Yoga helps you connect your body with your mind which I think is an essential tool when gaining inner as well as outer strengths. I feel Yoga is like a breath of fresh air in today’s society, since we live in such a fast-pace kind of environment. Also, if you are looking to burn the most calories you should try a weight training class which will also help you build muscle. Group classes are the best because they encourage you to give it your all and don’t allow you to give up. Whatever kind of exercise you prefer to do, get out there and do it! I promise you will feel better after it’s done. Also, remember to take deep breaths through your nose because when you do this oxygen will reach parts of the brain that help your entire organisms.
5. Listen to some great music: Music has a way of connecting us with our deepest emotions. Usually when people write songs they are expressing their deepest feelings and that may explain why we can relate so well. When we’re feeling sad we tend to listen to sad music because it makes us feel like we’re not alone in this world, and remember you are never alone. It makes us feel like someone else has felt or better yet is feeling the same way we are. That alone can make us feel better about the heartache we may be going through. On the opposite end, when we are getting ready to go clubbing or somewhere fun we’d rather listen to something more upbeat. Something we can shake our bodies to and sing out loud to right? We want to get in the ‘mood’ when prepping for a fun night out. Music has a way of evoking many different emotions in us and it can make even the most dreaded task, like cleaning a little better :) so put on that great music and sing along! Great music websites like Pandora have made it even easier to hear great music by combining the type of genres you like, create your personal playlists today http://www.pandora.com/
6. Watch something funny: whether it is a funny movie, comedy show, or a funny youtube video. People feel better after they’ve had a good laugh no matter in what situation they may be in. And when you feel better you interact with others in a more optimistic way. That then helps strengthen your relationships and as a result of that your self-esteem is heightened since you feel more love from others towards you. Some of my personal favorite youtube videos are “shit ___say,” they have everything ranging from shit single girls say, to shit Asian moms say. You will definitely find one you can relate to and they are hilarious since most of the time they are played by men dressed like women with funny wigs and accents to go along with. One of my favorite comedians is Kat Williams since I find his comedy to be on the more positive side of life. I wasn’t really a fan of stand-up comedy until I came across Kat. The point of this segment is to let you know that a few laughs will go a long way in regards to self-esteem, watch these hilarious videos: